Italian Beach Balloon Seller

I get up early and arrange my gizmos

Floaters, tubes, baskets, watches, jewelry

faux Gucci faux fendi with real glitz


I gather these things with a number of  new Italiano

words picked up on the beach "Poco Caro, ti piace?"

I mouth the r's as I tie the balloons to my walking stick

"Signora, ti piace?" sometimes does the trick.


I walk on the sand

I walk on my heels

I walk like a warrior

Who has run out of appeals


Brazen, I carry my balloons full to the hilt

The breeze from the ocean agitates them like a virus

I am towering, visible like a lighthouse that weebles  in every direction

Yet invisible to thousands of beachgoers,  as if I had an infection.


I am aped

Made fun of

A child runs in front of me,  pretends to be Tarzan

So I show him my urban hero, a yellow-belted Batman.


The beach is my highway

Straight with no detours

It gives me time to think of my love, my home

And Amanpour's news tours.


I get home feeling toasted

And fall into a dream:

It's a modern Tarzan in the jungle with Jane

She's tweeting on her iPhone while swinging on a vine,

"Kowbunga dudettes, boy pumped up. New microwave,

gnarly programs and bell ding dong lol!"

And Tarzan while riding a rocky Rhino tweets:

"If Cheetah could say "I love u" that would be awesome."

They take the elevator tree whose cable is pulled by an elephant


But then I feel pressure on my neck and I am gasping for air

It is a hand holding my head

Pushing me under water, forcing me to swear.

"You must take Amazon Prime" says the hand

My arms flail like my balloons in the wind

"You must have Prime!" it shouts.

Then a lawyer appears holding a thumb in his hand

"You forgot this on the beach."

"I, I forgot.."

The thumb was full of sand but it was a thumb.

"Yes, and Viareggio Beach House is suing you because
the Marchese Santo Pallone found it and threw up her
entire shrimp salad."

Then, I wake up with a glorious Tarzan cry,

aaahuaaa uaaa uaaaaaaaaaaaa!

There it is:

The Amazon Prime Card on the floor.