I, Carbird, I am
Not an albatros hung from the neck of an aging sailor
Nor a newborn nerd of Nature
Wishing to blow bubbles through a ring without soap
My wings drive through the hot noxious fumes
They flap and merge into the fast lane
With wanderlust, zufrieden!
Carbird
Some know me as Ford Falcon, Firebird or Golden Eagle
I am known to have more horsepower than a Puffin at a crossing
I am known to tailgate using my winged mirrors,
Airfoil plumes
Hybrid transmission
Roundabout synergy
My friends run around with
Adaptive cruise control
Drowsiness Detectors
Magic Body Control and
Night Vision
That just has me sound my beep, pressing the HOORN!
As I fill up with biodiversity
And make sure this time there won't be
Bidirectional blame
'Cause a Pontiac Firebird is maneuvering from a hard shoulder
Hitting a pothole and rolling over in MY direction
The driver, a loose goose, texting, sexting
We're both heading to a cul-de-sac when
A Proud Boy on an electric scooter
Holding a wooden hammer gives me a smile
He only as 6 teeth but his grimace is one of
Road Rage
(I thought baseball bats were used by default)
Then a white Buick Skylark 1963
Came swooping up the wrong way of a cobblestoned roundabout
Flashing its retrofitted, rehabilitated custom rejuvenescent tail lights
Burning black tread from its White Wall tires
RPM in the Red
From my birds eye view I thought again... and maybe it wasn't a Skylark
But an Austin Martin Cygnet
Crash! At that moment the Proud Boy smashed my windshield with his hammer
I hit the brakes,
My hydrocarbon emissions were past inspectability
The guy's hammer got stuck in my triangular vent window
And since it was attached to her wrist he went flying as the car dragged him across the driveway
(Pulled like on waterskis, his golden wavy locks clashed with his green military fatigues)
(A scream? If there was a scream it was drowned out by the sound of the spinning tires)
Of a house that happened to belong to Jay Leno, and 180 car collection.
Jay came running out, flames and smoke rising from his ashen head -that was a separate accident
I stopped the car, sprung out, flapped my wings too put out the fire, and hopped 3 steps on the
Zebra crossing before taking to the skies, promising myself
Never to look back into my rear view mirror.
