jeudi 17 mai 2012

Me and My Drone

No two drones are alike
My drone
A high hurling autopilot deus ex machina
Has followed me and my family for years.
Sometimes I ask: "How many ways doth my drone love thee?"

One: When I painted my roof with tar, the drone checked from an altitude of 3,000 feet (using its  gamma ray sensors, biological sensors,  camera through the clouds) if the tar had indeed seeped into the cracks.

Two: to make sure that my balding spot is properly brushed when going to work.

Three: when visiting a new site my drone can tell me how many stairs I have to walk up or down.

Four: My drone can tell me how many police cars are in my neighborhood; knowing where they are stalking has made me more relaxed and my blood pressure has gone down.

Five: Since I love chipmunks I wish to know, before my dog gets my morning paper, how many chipmunks are in my garden.

My drone, rain or shine, can send me accurate information regarding not only chipmunks, but chipmunk predators. That's also why I arm my drone with Tomahawks SSH1A's (a family version missile that is meant to take out only domestic animals) because there are too many cats in my neighborhood.

My community doesn't with that we use the leaf-blower if there are more than 6 blowers on the block, I can do a quick check and see how many neighbors are blowing before taking out my gear.

And what about all those hours spent waiting to buy a ticket on Broadway? Since we have our drone we have cut those lines in half, using stealth technology brings on a windfall of smiles.

 From my remote control synthetic vision system I can
night or day,
seek, observe and react in real time to real situations

I can even follow my kids movements 
whether they be 10 or 10,000 miles from home!
My wife and I are so happy with our drone we
decided to buy another one.

The XXX-WMW by Lockeed
-Capable of flying 24 hours a day 
-Capable of being recharged by laser light
-Capable of flying up to 200 mph with a decibel count of under 50
The XXX-WMW has been approved by the San Francisco Police and
The Serbian Vanilla and Chocolate Swirly Tango dance company
(first reconnoitered by the XXX-WMWjr)

There are so many applications for a drone, it is time everyone should have their own 
With a global landscape that is more user friendly
The economy will sky rise.
Drones don't deliver delicious diners
But they can let us see our pizza on its way getting delivered.

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